Oh…oh, no. I thought I was tougher than everyone who said “run for the tissues”, but…wow. This looks…yeah. Always know where your towel is, in case there are no tissues handy.
Its so sad reading this… seeing Ed caught up in the cycle of abuse. They always say “I’ll stop. It won’t happen again.” It’s never any different. Never.
And like Ed said, there’s also the self-blame. You get told it’s your fault so often, you believe it. Or (and this has happened to me), you TAKE the blame, because it’s the only control you can pretend to have left.
“IF next time, I don’t burn dinner, I won’t get beaten. IF next time, I don’t forget to clean the den before being asked, I won’t get yelled at. IF I can be perfect, everything else will be ok. I just have to be perfect, and I won’t have to be afraid anymore.”
One thing that always REALLY strikes me about these panels that I feel sometimes gets lost in the sadness of the story is how much joy there really is in the first two paintings of the little one. All the lines seem to smile, especially the ones with the skin painter and the little one, and they make an abrupt contrast between earlier, potent panels of pain and show what the child really brought to Ed’s life.
Nigai you really hit it on the head…taking the blame…If I when it needs to be, “No, Blame casting is counterproductive. What is eating you? (meaning the abusive one)” Until that is dealt with, hurting others is the only result. As a counselor used to say: “Hurt people hurt people.” And so the vicious cycle continues.
It seems to me that only people who survive being such fools as this, so often and for so long, are the ones that truly attain the depths of wisdom in the end. But the price is so high … too high, unless they can pass that wisdom along to someone else and maybe save that person some pain …
With that in mind, I suppose Digger and Ed are each salvation for the other, in their way …
Random, you just wrecked this for me. I don’t mind the allusions at all in the other comments, it IS like listening to a story that others have heard before, but they don’t want to spoil it. They drop hints and giggle when a funny part is coming up, and it adds to the atmosphere. But reading your post made the mood drop like a rock for me. Thanks.
It’s not a spoiler, as such. Owl Caller all but came straight out and told us Blood Eyes was Grim Eyes’ mother — remember the bit about finally having shaken the family madness, and Grim Eyes having “good blood on her father’s side”? All those hints during the funeral were the setup so that we’d fully understand this story.
Still a horrifying tragedy, though, as domestic abuse always is. Also makes the bit where Grim Eyes comes to Ed’s cave to warn Digger of the Cold Servants that much more saddening…
For the benefit of any new readers coming through the archives behind me: Nowhere in this story is it conclusively confirmed that Grim Eyes is Ed’s daughter. The hints, as described above, are fairly conclusive, but they are it.
So the above “spoiler” is not a spoiler at all, and Random is officially un-demonized.
*hangs head in sympathy for Skin-Painter*
Oh…oh, no. I thought I was tougher than everyone who said “run for the tissues”, but…wow. This looks…yeah. Always know where your towel is, in case there are no tissues handy.
Its so sad reading this… seeing Ed caught up in the cycle of abuse. They always say “I’ll stop. It won’t happen again.” It’s never any different. Never.
And like Ed said, there’s also the self-blame. You get told it’s your fault so often, you believe it. Or (and this has happened to me), you TAKE the blame, because it’s the only control you can pretend to have left.
“IF next time, I don’t burn dinner, I won’t get beaten. IF next time, I don’t forget to clean the den before being asked, I won’t get yelled at. IF I can be perfect, everything else will be ok. I just have to be perfect, and I won’t have to be afraid anymore.”
One thing that always REALLY strikes me about these panels that I feel sometimes gets lost in the sadness of the story is how much joy there really is in the first two paintings of the little one. All the lines seem to smile, especially the ones with the skin painter and the little one, and they make an abrupt contrast between earlier, potent panels of pain and show what the child really brought to Ed’s life.
Nigai you really hit it on the head…taking the blame…If I when it needs to be, “No, Blame casting is counterproductive. What is eating you? (meaning the abusive one)” Until that is dealt with, hurting others is the only result. As a counselor used to say: “Hurt people hurt people.” And so the vicious cycle continues.
And Ed’s joy is over.
Subtle hitchhiker-reference Jon, but still true. Don’t Panic.
Poor baby Grim Eyes.
“Skin painter is fool.”
It seems to me that only people who survive being such fools as this, so often and for so long, are the ones that truly attain the depths of wisdom in the end. But the price is so high … too high, unless they can pass that wisdom along to someone else and maybe save that person some pain …
With that in mind, I suppose Digger and Ed are each salvation for the other, in their way …
Aw, the baby’s cute!
Random, you just wrecked this for me. I don’t mind the allusions at all in the other comments, it IS like listening to a story that others have heard before, but they don’t want to spoil it. They drop hints and giggle when a funny part is coming up, and it adds to the atmosphere. But reading your post made the mood drop like a rock for me. Thanks.
Damn. My first time through, too, and I haven’t found the comments to contain any real spoilers until now.
What’s done is done, and if the spoiler comment were going to be removed, it would have been by now.
Besides, a Blood Eyes – Grim Eyes familial relationship is not that big a stretch to figure out; as spoilers go, this one really isn’t that bad …
Boneclaw Mother, in particular, commented that Grim Eyes was of Blood_’s line.
It’s not a spoiler, as such. Owl Caller all but came straight out and told us Blood Eyes was Grim Eyes’ mother — remember the bit about finally having shaken the family madness, and Grim Eyes having “good blood on her father’s side”? All those hints during the funeral were the setup so that we’d fully understand this story.
Still a horrifying tragedy, though, as domestic abuse always is. Also makes the bit where Grim Eyes comes to Ed’s cave to warn Digger of the Cold Servants that much more saddening…
oh nooo… :'(
That last line breaks my heart everytime i read it.
For the benefit of any new readers coming through the archives behind me: Nowhere in this story is it conclusively confirmed that Grim Eyes is Ed’s daughter. The hints, as described above, are fairly conclusive, but they are it.
So the above “spoiler” is not a spoiler at all, and Random is officially un-demonized.
😉